Monthly Archives: April 2011

Feeling horny

You can never leave your past behind you in the Ozarks. My hometown was so small that the kids you started kindergarten with were the exact same people you graduated high school with. There was never the mercy of being … Continue reading

Posted in People, School | Leave a comment

Mullets Are No Fun

When I was in third grade I had the most amazing, Billy Ray Cyrus-style mullet anyone had ever seen on a little girl. That’s why I feel justified in writing this song. Hope you enjoy.

Posted in Uncategorized | Leave a comment

All she wants to do is ride

These are Omagles. They are essentially life-size Tinker Toys, but better. Using interlocking joints and plastic pipes, children can build virtually anything. Some well-meaning relative bought my sisters and me a set for Christmas one year. This relative envisioned us … Continue reading

Posted in Family, Goats | Leave a comment

Make the most of what you’ve got

Last month, I wrote about a taxidermy-museum-turned-strip-club known as Call of the Wild. At the time, I found it amusing that such different businesses could be housed under the same roof, but I was reminded of the waste-not-want-not resourcefulness of … Continue reading

Posted in People | Leave a comment